What do you tell people?

How do you tell people your chid is deaf? It's not like there is anything obvious, and it's nothing to be ashamed of, but I wouldn't want people to think I was ashamed or keeping it a secret. I thought maybe I could do a birth announcement with finger spelled "welcome baby". But I haven't quite gotten to that yet. I will do a birth announcement, but with Facebook most of my friends and Family saw Peter when he was less than an hour old! Three days after the big ABR test were flying to Charlotte, NC for a family reunion of sorts. My brother-in-law is fighting cancer, and we wanted to bring love and support in person. My MIL had lost her husband to cancer a few years back, and now her daughter's husband...so she was emotionally raw already when I told her the results of the ASSR and ABR and she burst into tears. I was a little offended (even though I know she didn't mean anything bad!) and I tried to tell her that he was still a healthy happy baby, and he was just deaf. Maybe I am naive. I figured it would be a lot of work, but that he would grow up to be a happy, independent, smart, productive member of society, just like anyone else. Ok, well, like other smart, happy, productive deaf people. And we have great new opportunities in hearing aids and other electronic assistance that wasn't around a generation ago! Why shouldn't the world be Peter's oyster? I decided that since kids live up to (or down to) parental expectations, I was going to keep my attitude of "he's just deaf" when we were at the family reunion. Luckily, I have an awesome family (by blood they are my husband's, but now they are mine, too). Everyone wanted to cuddle the baby. Everyone talked to him. His Nana made him coo and smile by being silly with him. People were curious about deafness, but not pitying, or anything else negative. My little guy didn't get to go boating on Lake Norman (too small), but I think he had a pretty good time! Since the initial news and that trip I have told many people about Peter's deafness. For te Facebook crowd on the 3rd of July I posted a link to an ASL version of Katy Perry's "Firework" and dedicated it "in honor of the Fourth and my profoundly deaf son". I try to keep it matter of fact, but it can get awkward. A tipsy woman at a party thought I was being sarcastic or kidding- yeah, she said, those third kids can sleep through anything, "no, he's really deaf!" I said. She didn't really know how to answer that. Now his hearing aids are conversation starters (bright blue!) and I must say he is mighty cute wearing them.