I try to live in the moment and appreciate the little joys every day. That can be so hard when dealing with my daughters, who seem to have gone feral, a cranky baby, and obnoxious dogs knocking over garbage and peeing in the girls' room.
I try to appreciate the people I meet and the experiences I have, but I don't think I will ever be one of those people who says my child's deafness is such a blessing because of all the great people I have met and how much I have learned. But neither will I say that it is a curse and wonder what I did to deserve this. It is what it is.
Any decision or circumstance changes our path in life a bit, and we get the opportunity to meet people and learn from our experiences on any of those paths. I am thankful that the people in the Deaf community that I have met have been helpful, and have welcomed Peter and his family with open arms. I am thankful that all the doctors and specialists on Peter's team have been kind, open-minded, and easy to work with. I am thankful I don't have to fight with my health insurance company about anything. I am thankful that we live near great schools, and that no matter what technology can or can't give Peter, he will have access to a great education. I haven't spent a lot of time wishing all of this weren't necessary. It is what it is. I do get exhausted and overwhelmed sometimes, but I couldn't say whether that is due to dealing with all this stuff, or just cause I have three kids....
I do wish for a few things- but only in a tongue-in-cheek way: an extra 24-hours in a week, sanity, a magic wand to clean my house, but I think those are pretty standard mom wishes ;). I do need to figure out how to make sure my daughters get enough attention, and try to not create a situation where they resent their little brother for hogging all of my time. Balance is going to be one of the really big challenges over the next few months, but they are worth it. I try to remind myself every day that my three amazing kids are my blessings.
Well said! I do not know if I will ever become one of those people who claim that their child's deafness was a "gift and a blessing." While I am happy for them, it is pretty tough to view it in that light. It also still comes down to the fact that I still get sad over the whole thing and I think it is important to acknowledge that feeling from time to time if to only purge the negative from your system. That sad feeling over Butters' hearing loss came back yesterday mostly because I was having to wrestle with him on the floor to get his hearing aids back into his ears. We are entering that growth spurt stage the closer he gets to that one year mark where he realizes that he is capable of more things, especially in the realm of movement! But he is also trying to assert his authority already, which has caught me by surprise.
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